The thing about Maine

I support gay marriage.  Having just been married a few months ago, I can tell you there are a lot of legal benefits afforded to married couples.  We are now eligible to be covered by each other's group insurance policies at work, which saves us over a thousand dollars a year. The day before we were married we'd been living together for six years, we owned a house together, but we weren't eligible under each other's policies.  The day after we were married, we were.  Our insurance rates went down; our taxes will be calculated differently.  Just because we have that marriage certificate.

There are a lot of legal benefits that go along with marriage, and I don't think it's fair to deny these to citizens on the basis of sexual orientation any more than it would be fair to deny them to people based on skin color, age, or religion.  That's what I believe.  That's what I will vote for.  Not everyone agrees with me.  Many people disagree.  Do I think they're misguided and misinformed?  Yes.  Am I disappointed over the election in Maine?  Yes. 

Do I think that everyone in Maine is a stupid idiot who doesn't deserve a vote? Absolutely not.  It really saddens me to see all the hatred being thrown around.  People are saying that everyone in Maine is an idiot.  The "why" explanation in Brizzly yesterday said Maine was the "land of cretins."  Here's the thing: most states do not have legalized gay marriage. If you're calling everyone in Maine an idiot because gay marriage is now outlawed there, what does that make you, if your state doesn't allow it either? 

And here's the other thing: the election was very close.  Nearly 50% of the voters were for gay marriage. 

And here's the third and last thing: People in this country are allowed to disagree.  I don't enjoy being called an idiot because I support gay marriage.  Name-calling is completely unproductive.  Calling someone stupid is not going to help them see things from your point of view.  It's certainly not going to make them change their mind.  It adds nothing to a discussion.

Let's grow up, people.  Calling each other names isn't going to move us forward, no matter which direction you consider forward to be.  

Comments

[-R-]

I agree, BUT I do think being against gay marriage is a bigoted point of view, and I'm not afraid to say that. Of course, that doesn't mean I think everyone in Maine (or anywhere else) is a bigot.

[Pink Herring]

I agree. I dont think its any more rational or legal than outlawing interracial marriages. I just dont think calling everyone who disagrees with you an idiot is helpful, you know? Thats what I was trying to say.

[NGS]

I think it's okay to say that bigots are idiots. It's just okay with me. (But you, of course, don't have to accept my POV....)

Oh, and can I tell you how much MORE we had to pay in taxes because we got married? It's a bad scene. We filed separately the first year (because we could) and now we can't and the amount of money we owe is somewhat surprising!

[Ashley, the Accidental Olympian]

I too find that the instant turn to 'name calling' is absolutely absurd. I heard people say, "I'm really disappointing in Maine." At least it was on the ballet! What about all the states who wont even bring the issue to a vote? What about all the people who worked hard to try to legalize gay marriage? Is their work no longer valid/important/celebratory?

Sadly, human beings seem to resist change. As with every other social battle that has been won in America, this one too will take time. Although Maine was unable to legalize gay marriage this time, I am sure that the next time it stumbles onto the ballet there will be more awareness, better tactics, and possibly a better outcome.

And if nothing else, what didn't happen in Maine, happened *sort of* in WA with the passing FINALLY of the Everything BUT Marriage law. Lets take our victories where we can right?

Thanks for writing about this!

[Slice of Pink]

Name calling is SO junior high! America needs to grow up.

[Kristan]

I'm with you 100%! Well put!