8 weeks

Today's post brought to you by the letter B and the date February 2, 2011.

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I went in to the ultrasound not really knowing what to expect. I know everyone says that it's a hugely emotional moment when you hear the baby's heartbeat, and I believed them... but we're nowhere near that stage yet. Mostly I was just excited to make sure there was really a baby in there, not a blighted ovum (for those not initiated into the cult of pregnancy hypochondria, a blighted ovum is when an embryo fails to develop within the placenta. You can have all the symptoms of pregnancy, just no baby in there. Why, why WHY must I google these things?) or some conspiracy of the universe to trick me into thinking I was pregnant by providing me with eleven false positive pregnancy tests and some kind of evil flu that makes me feel like barfing for a month straight.  Oh, and I wanted to confirm just how far along we were, since that had been an argument with the nurse at our first appointment (the first appointment was for talking and information only. BORING!). Did you know that at the moment of conception, the medical establishment considers you to be 2 weeks pregnant? How stupid is that? It's got something to do with counting from the date of your last period (which, theoretically, would be 14 days prior to ovulation if you have a 28-day period) but I maintain that it's total bullshit -- especially because I no longer believe that anyone has a 28-day period. Mine, (TMI alert), prior to our conception was 57 days long. So... counting from the first day of my last period was NOT going to be accurate. Apparently medical people don't care about that. At that visit, I was given a due date of August 28th, based solely on my last period.  I calculated my own due date to be Sept 13, based on the fact that I'd been paying attention and keeping track and, you know, can count (with the help of a calendar. And a calculator. And an excel spreadsheet to doublecheck the math). Anyway, I was pretty goddamn sure that Sept 13 was correct and August 28 was WRONG. 

We got to the doctors office and were promptly informed that there had been a scheduling snafu and I was not on the list to get an ultrasound that morning. That went over well, as you can imagine. My own tendency is always to assume I messed up in these situations, so I was REALLY glad Joel was there to confirm that no, I was not crazy, we had both stood there while the nurse scheduled us for an ultrasound at 10:30am thankyouverymuch.  They squeezed us in and I didn't even have to cry, although I would have been happy to oblige and was getting mighty close.

You guys, it was insane. I have had ultrasound as a therapy for knee pain and back pain before, and that basically involves using the machine as a deep tissue massager.  It's not hooked up to a monitor and a physical therapist just rolls the thing around on your knee for ten minutes. I was expecting pretty much the same thing, except Joel, the tech, and I would all be riveted to the monitor, searching for blobs that could possibly look a little bit like a tiny baby -- kind of like a Where's Waldo Ultrasound. Nope - the tech (who I loved because she was wearing cute boots and leggings) plopped the thing on my stomach and BOOM. There was our blob. No searching, no "maybe that's it... no, maybe THAT'S it" like I'd imagined.  No blighted ovum.  A definite blob with a head and a body. I started choking up immediately but managed not to start outright crying because 1) I didn't want to cry in front of the tech and her cute boots, and 2) I thought that if I started sobbing and moving my stomach too much, she'd have to stop. And oh man, I could have looked at that blob all day. She did a ton of measurements and showed us the umbilical cord and the yolk sac (yolk sac? Am I gestating a chicken?) and it was just like all those pictures in the books except it was RIGHT THERE.  It was amazing. We saw the fluttering of its little blob heart and oh my god, I am going to lose it just typing this.  Everything is going just fine, and my official due date was revised to... September 13th. TOLD YOU SO, NURSE LADY.

We got a bunch of printouts to take home and when we got home I immediately took photos of the photos (uh, didn't want to take them into work and accidentally leave them on the scanner) and emailed them to every member of our families.

I've seen lots of ultrasound pictures before on blogs and facebook, and I never really understood the point of sharing them. It just looks like a blob! No one can tell what's what. And yet, I just couldn't help myself. EVERYONE LOOK AT MY BLOB BABY.

 

Hey, if you want, you can click that photo to see an annotated version on Flickr! You know, if you care which end is the blob head and which end is the other blob stuff.

(After I sent my email blast I promptly hung the photos on the fridge. I'd make them my desktop background and wallpaper my office with photocopies if I weren't still in the closet at work.)

Hey, look! Here's a picture of me HOLDING the ultrasound photos! (I swear this is the last photo. Be glad I'm not making you look at the entire set; we're on course to fill an entire photo album long before the baby is even born.) Please ignore the large zit (edited to add: A ZIT I AM STILL SPORTING, BY THE WAY. Same one. Still there, two months later. Another fun pregnancy symptom!) and my professional artist's rendering of a football in honor of Superbowl Sunday. FYI, I am rooting for the Packers solely because I've wanted to yell PACKERS WIN THE SUPERBOWL ever since I first saw Mystery Science Theater 3000.  

 

Yes, our baby is destined to be a very big nerd.

Before the ultrasound I comforted my miscarriage fears with the thought that it wouldn't be that big of a deal. It would suck and it would be sad, but we could have another. It would be OK. Now... oh man, no. It would not be OK. Don't go anywhere, little blob, because I already love you.

Comments

[Life of a Doctor's Wife]

Awww I love this post! So sweet!!! Your baby is already SO LOVED.

[Janssen]

What a wonderful post. Isn't it true that you so don't care about babies until you have your own and then THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND BABIES!

[Mary Frances]

I totally have an ultrasound picture posted in the inside cover of my planner so that I can ogle my beautiful alien-baby constantly. Your blob is lovely.

[HollowSquirrel]

What a perfect little bean! You're such a sweet mommy, already OPH! We love you and your precious blob!!!!

[kirida]

Awww, I love ultrasound pictures and sweet babies that will appear soon enough.

[Frema]

Your blob baby is so cute! I am so happy for you and Joel.

Also, I love your talk of the early ultrasound picture. :) It reminds me of a friend of mine, who would complain on Facebook about people using their kids' photos as their avatar - he called it creepy. Then, he and his fiancee had twins this past December. In January, guess what he changed his avatar to? :) It really is different when the "blobs"/children in question are your own! :)

[heidikins]

I love this. Absolutely love it.

Congrats, my dear!

xox