Crossing the Delaware

I remember feeling utterly panicked in the dark days (let's be honest, dark weeks) after Hannah was born when I realized that one day I was probably going to have to go to the grocery store with her. By myself. This seemed like an impossible, horrific task -- where do you put the carseat while you're shopping? If you put it in the basket of the cart then there's no space for groceries, and if you bring the stroller frame instead you're restricted to what fits in the mesh basket underneath and even if you completely ignore the printed warnings saying not to ever put more than five pounds of cargo in the basket (which clearly we do ignore because are you freaking kidding me), not much fits in there. It's not really possible to push a stroller AND a grocery cart at the same time, though you can sure believe I tried. I thought about taking Newborn Hannah out of the carseat and carrying her in the sling or the Ergo while we were in the store, but what if she was sleeping in the carseat when it was time to take her out? What if she was sleeping in the Ergo when it was time to put her back in the car? What if she started crying and then I started crying and fuck this, I'll just wait until Joel is home on the weekends and we can all go then. And that is what I did for a long while.

Eventually I did get up the nerve to leave the house with Newborn Hannah by myself, and it wasn't even that terrible. It helped a lot that I saw a lady at Walmart who had her carseat perched on top of the purse-holder/child seat part of of the grocery cart and immediately began copying that little trick; though it looks a bit precarious it is quite sturdy if you get the car seat's hooks in correctly over wire of the grocery cart. Then not only can the baby see you the whole time, you have all the space in the main basket free! Genius. I was very happy with this arrangement. Even though Joel mentioned multiple times that he didn't think it was 100% safe, blahbittyblahblah YOU TRY SHOPPING WITH A BABY BY YOURSELF OH MY GOD YOU HAVE NO IDEA LEAVE ME ALONE.

Also, for a long time the grocery store was her favorite place to take naps. Because, you know, bright florescent lights and blaring elevator music = bedtime. This is the picture I wanted to send to every asshole who instructed me to "sleep when the baby sleeps!" ORLY, should I lie down right here in the ziploc bag aisle and take a snooze or do you think the freezer section would be better?

But as it is with all things baby, just when you get really comfortable with something, the baby decides HEY YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK I'LL CHANGE EVERYTHING. Plus, in this case, the baby got so heavy that lugging her fifteen pounds of chub plus the sixteen pound carseat became a task to dread in and of itself. Then my friend mentioned that she had started letting her baby sit in the grocery cart when they went to the store. BOOM. Another problem with a very simple solution that I never in a million years would have come up with myself. Hannah loved riding around in that cart, showing off her new sitting up skills to every person whose attention she could grab.

YAY COOL RANCH DORITOS R ON SALE AWESOMEZ

(And of course, Joel let me know that I was again being unsafe because in these photos I didn't have her buckled in with the safety belt which IN MY DEFENSE that cart didn't have and how was I supposed to know there was a vital safety feature missing from the cart I grabbed?)

And now, the little missus has learned to stand up. And guess where she wants to stand up? In the grocery cart. I had her at Target today and she was hell bent on standing up and riding around, safety belt be damned. In desperation, I put her in the main basket of the cart in hopes she'd become distracted from her favorite game, Let's Jump Out of Containment Devices and Try to Break Our Heads, and start playing her second-favorite game, Pull Random Things Out of Momma's Purse and Eat Them. But no, that did not sound like fun. Not nearly enough potential for skull breaking. She immediately reached up and grabbed the rim of the cart and pulled herself to a stand. And you know what? I let her ride around the store like that, like a tiny little Washington Crossing the Delaware (except I don't see the sides of the boat coming up to Mr. Washington's nose) (nor do I see him bopping around with joy and trying to reach out and grab the pants of passersby).

Of course, I am well aware that this is Not Completely Safe and I'm sure it's not on Target's Official Corporate List of Approved Shopping Cart Uses either. But no one lost a limb or bashed to their head into anything, and that's more than I can say for an average hour at home nowadays. Because you know what is Not Completely Safe At All? The fact that babies want to start walking before they, you know, know how.

Standing Up Baby demands immediate walking priveliges, screw you and your gravitvy and balance and intact skulls.

Comments

[Mom]

at yoga our teacher encourages us to keep trying even if we fall over or can't manage the pose, and he uses a baby learning to standup and walk. That baby keeps falling, but keeps trying, and trying, and trying until she masters the pose! But I know it is hard to watch sometimes! Let's just hope she masters this skill quickly. Wait till you watch her learn stairs!!

[heidikins]

Gah, she's so cute! I can't believe she's big enough to think she can start walking! Goodness, what a cute little munchkin.

xox

[badger reader]

So cute! Her expressions are killing me in these last few posts. The chips/shopping cart one is definitely my favorite.

[-R-]

Ree always tries to stand up in the seat of the grocery cart. Aargh.

[Liz]

I see you guys hit the Oreo aisle. Please tell me you indulged.

[Chrissie]

Oh my goodness, she is so freaking adorable. And that paragraph about crossing the Delaware was awesome... love it!

[Isabel]

Could she be any cuter? (I don't think so.)

Rerun is the same darn way...he wants to stand in the cart. He cries and screams and demands I let him do it. I usually do let him if Babboo sits in the back of the cart with him. (This may actually be worse. I'm not sure.) A few weeks ago I let Rerun do it, without Babboo in the cart with him....and when Babboo and I turned around to look at something...he fell out onto the floor at Target. I KNOW I'M A BAD PARENT AND I TAKE ALL THE BLAME. It was horrible. HORRIBLE. I screamed super loud, right there in Target. And he screamed.

But he was fine. Nothing broken, etc. But dude, so close.

I guess all those warnings on the carts are for real. Now I know. (Hangs head in shame.)

[Audrey]

Oh my goodness, the image of her standing in the cart like Washinton crossing the Delaware is TOO MUCH. (Too much cute, and too much funny, that is.)

[Angela Noelle]

I have very clear memories of riding around in the big basket of the shopping cart as a wee one. I've often cringed at the thought of grocery shopping with two little ones--I think it's going to be quite a few months of your earliest technique of just waiting until the hubs or a friend is available to go with me!

[Life of a Doctor's Wife]

I am a little woozy from all the cute.

[Mary Mihaha]

Hannah makes riding in a grocery look like THE FUNNEST THING EVER! She also does it pretty adorably too.

[Frema]

I love reading your take on new motherhood and babies. So relatable! Hannah is adorbs and YOU, my friend, are doing a fantastic job.

[Lisa]

Every time I see someone with their carseat/carrier in the grocery part of the grocery cart, I want to say, "IT FITS IN THE SEAT! Snap that baby in there!"

[Kayla]

Love the look of the site, its cool and your child's picture looks stinnung at the top.Just regarding your post and baby items which are a waste of money and those that are good, one thing you should waste/invest your money on is a lullaby lightshow, (though I dont know if they still make them but someone does).They play music, usually Brahms, and have a little lightshow. I was able to put my daughter to bed and she would fall asleep to this without having to sit over her. Leaving me free to do all the other things you need to do for a baby when you have a moment.Anyway will be popping back again And thanks for the link, sometimes you find really cool sites when they have linked to you, which is how I found gingerpixel, us redheads have to stick together

[TheBest]

Review by Sonya L. Madden for Rating: this liner is perfect for ludnary, groceries, cans or just carting stuff around. Liner fit perfectly into my cart.m I use it everywhere. When the weather gets nasty my stuff is protected. I take a city bus, so my stuff is out in the open. I'm not bending over to retriewve spilled groceries or clean clothes off a dirty ground.SHOPPING CART LINER BRAND NEW GROCERY BLACK

[Aziz]

pspan class="comment-author"Suzanne span-/span /spanOh Melissa, I wish we knew each other in person. I see you on FRAMED and read your aosmwee blogs. You have such a way of writing and making beautiful pictures go together so elegantly. My day is better when I read these blogs. My two favs? The one you wrote about Rachel when her baby was born, and this one you wrote about your own sweet angels decent from heaven./ppThank you, you are truly blessed with many gifts./ppSuzanne/p

[Sandiv]

Beverly - You really cteuarpd all of our feelings for our evening of service. No activity could have been more rewarding than being at the Rescue Mission with these grateful people and hearing their amazing stories. How thankful I am for caring people who set up facilities like the mission to aid people at some point of dependency during their life and then provide a way for others like us to be involved. Thanks to you and Philip for making us aware that we need to do this type of service as often as we can!!

[ConcursoDe]

Lyna - I totally agree with you! I just had my fifth baby and now I amslot laugh at how easy 3 was. Though it wasn't really easy;) If I had a dollar for every time I hear Looks like you've got your hands full Well one hand full, to be exact. And my arms full and my lap full and my heart overflowing. I am blessed. Your girls are beautiful! Like their mama:)

[Jay]

Review by Jerlyn M. Thomas for Rating: My ex nicknamed it the Granny Cart but I feel like I can do alot more with this cart. I live in NYC and I go to the lamndrouat and grocery store (I do alot of walking) so this is very easy to push around with my clothing or groceries. The only downside is that I am tall (5 10 ) so sometimes I slouch to push it. However, moving heavy things is made easy with this.