The Good: The vet called on Saturday. I am the proud owner of three parasite-free cats.
The Bad: Someone has started peeing on the rug in the litterbox room. I can't be sure since I have yet to catch the offender in the act, but I think it's Max. In that case, I take back all the nice things I said about being so proud of him and all that bullshit. WTF, Maxwell? No, really, WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?
Also, Max and Madison are also both due for their 3-year rabies shots, and I've decided to take them in together. Time-saver, or official proof that I have gone plum crazy, because OMGWTF ARE YOU THINKING WOMAN? Only time will tell! Stay tuned! And in the meantime, I promise, no more crazy cat lady talk!
The Ugly: I have somehow managed to sweat through my light, button-down shirt. It's not even noon. I only wore a light coat that was completely appropriate for the springtime weather this morning, and I wasn't all red-faced when I got to work. I'm not a big sweater. I put on deodorant this morning. And yet, there they are: two big pit stains (luckily, not overtly visible because this shirt I'm wearing is a light color).
I think I have my special expensive deodorant to blame for this, but I'm not really sure what to do. And this is where you come in, interweb peoples, because I need help. Serious help. You cannot imagine how much stress I have over Deodorant Issues.
See, all my t-shirts that are even moderately fitted have black/brown pit stains on them. I don't even buy white shirts any more. I am positive this is not sweat-related because the shirts I wear to the gym and to hot yoga classes have no such stains. I was at the point of just giving up deodorant altogether last year when I complained about this annoying problem, OMG ALL MY SHIRTS HAVE PIT STAINS, WAHHHH, to my friend, KP, who admitted she had the exact same problem -- until she switched to the Adidas brand deodorant. Adidas deodorant is aluminum-free, she explained, and it's the aluminum that causes the staining. I rushed out to the store to buy a case or twelve of Adidas deodorant, and guess what? Safeway doesn't carry it. But they do carry Tom's of Maine deodorant, which for the $5-a-stick price tag is also aluminum-free. It's also all natural, organic, and cruelty free, which is all good and fine and great, but most importantly: NO ALUMINUM.
Since I've started using my hippie deodorant made from hops and rainbows and unicorn tears, I haven't noticed a single new pit stain. Not even on the shirts I wear under sweaters, which tend to be tighter and of, ahem, a slightly lower quality than shirts I'd normally wear. Hooray! Except that I'm now sweating through my shirts in the middle of winter. I fear what will happen when the Baltimore Summer rolls around. I'll probably drown in a puddle of my own sweat before I made it halfway to work. What am I to do?
Please tell me I'm not the only one who has this many issues with freaking deodorant. And then, tell me how to fix this. Do you have strong feelings about deodorant? A favorite? A magical solution to my problems, preferably one that doesn't include showering more often? I should mention that I have tried the Dove line, and while I love their "real beauty" ad campaign as much as the next girl, I hate their deodorant and you couldn't pay me to try it again. (OK, yes you could, but you'd have to make it worth my while because that shit not only stained my shirts like nobody's business, it also STANK after a few hours of normal wear).
I swear to God, just while I was typing this, I ACTUALLY SWEATED MORE. My office temperature is normally set to "Polar Ice Cap" and I haven't moved from my chair in over an hour. WHAT IS GOING ON? Early menopause? Global warming? Severe Case of the Mondays? I haven't a freaking clue, but I'm pretty sure this is all Max's fault.