So, blah blah, out of town sooo many weekends blabbity blah, so behind on stuff at home, blah. You don't care about that. I don't care about that.
What I DO care about is the fact that I've had The Secret Life of the American Teenager up in my "In My Tivo" sidebar for weeks now, although I hadn't actually seen any of the episodes. I set up a Season Pass the minute I heard that it was by the makers of Seventh Heaven and that Molly Ringwald was in it, but I didn't actually have time to watch the pilot until this weekend (blah, busy busy, blah). I am extremely concerned that if any of you actually look at the sidebar, you might have been thinking all this time that I liked the show. Let me clear that up right now: Holy fucking disappointment, Batman. It sure is by the makers of Seventh Heaven, THAT'S for sure. They've even got the same soundtrack and everything. But instead of Ashlee Simpson, we've got Molly Ringwald... which is just embarrassing for dear Molly and now half as fun as being able to watch Ashlee Simpson "act". Instead of Haylie Duff, we have John Schneider, which... ditto. Sad for John Schneider, not even half as entertaining as Haylie freaking Duff playing a knocked up teenager turned reverend/minister/whatever. Joel came in when I was halfway through the pilot and he almost started crying when he realized our beloved Johnathan Kent from Smallville was on this show. And that about sums it up. I finished the pilot, it was terrible: preachier than Seventh Heaven (I didn't think it was possible either!) and not half as entertaining, plus some rookie casting director made the mistake of casting actors that look like identical twins as the Good Guy and the Bad Guy, and that confused the hell out of me. In summary, shame on you, Molly and John, the show sucks completely and totally, I deleted the remaining four episodes in my cache without even watching them and I threw up in my mouth when I saw a preview for this week's episode alluding to the fact that Good Guy was apparently going to propose to Knocked Up Protagonist. So, that's that. I just needed to clear that up.
Secondly, I started reading Twilight, and I'm in a bit of a quandary. You see, I somehow managed to completely miss out on the whole Harry Potter craze, and I'm still kicking myself for that, but what's done is done. However, when I heard about this newfangled "Breaking Dawn" book coming out, fourth in some series that all the kids were raving about, I thought to myself hmmm... maybe I should see what that's all about. I ordered the first book from the library, about six months later I finally got it, and HOLY HELL, NO ONE TOLD ME THESE BOOKS WERE ABOUT VAMPIRES. I liked Buffy before liking Buffy was cool (what do you mean, liking Buffy was never cool?), I carried around The Historian for weeks so I could read it during every spare minute, and I am still pissed that they canceled Moonlight, because WTF TV producer dudes, can't you give a show a chance? IT WAS GETTING BETTER. I'm a sucker (HAHA) for all things vampire. I don't know why... I just am. So basically, this lady writes four books that are the Next Coming of Harry Potter and they're ALSO about vampires, and NO ONE TOLD ME. Well, that's not true, Isabel told me, and I should have known she was right. Because Isabel is always right.
So now for the dilemma: I have been staying up all night, talking to my coworkers about it all day, and BRINGING THE BOOK TO WORK so I can read it on my lunch break. I started it on Sunday, and I'll probably be finished by Thursday, but the library still has New Moon backordered for weeks. I'm on a tight budget (more blah blah) and I set an Absolutely No Buying Books That's What Libraries Are For rule, but if i don't get a copy of New Moon STAT, I think I might die. Also, did you realize that the movie does not come out until December?! What the hell am I supposed to do until then?
Also, I kind of hate these "team" terms, but Edward all the way, dudes. ALLL the way, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.
Dear OPH, let me assure you that Breaking Dawn is as awesome as you are hoping for. Maybe even more so. Chris asked me last night what I was reading and as I explained the plot he stared at me like the words were making no sense at all.
Which, come to think of it, is probably close to true. Vampires and teenagers in love?!
Posted by: nancypearlwannabe | Tuesday, August 05, 2008 at 11:43 AM
I do not have words to express my love for the Twilight series. NO WORDS! It is a sickness that overtakes you! You can borrow my copy of New Moon if you want...not that that helps at this point but I'm all about the gesture. If you want to break down and buy it I'd try target (cheapish) or walmart (evil? yes. cheap? yes). I am going to withhold commenting on Breaking Dawn though...
Posted by: Sarah | Tuesday, August 05, 2008 at 11:51 AM
You are pretty much my lady hero. I didn't know you liked The Historian so much (and I recommended that! Yay me!) I, too, have also gotten sucked into the Twilight books. My inner teen girl has been let out and it is delightful! I think Amazon has New Moon for about $6 and you could totally break your rule for only $6. Right?
Posted by: Mary | Tuesday, August 05, 2008 at 12:19 PM
Those books are so awesome. And liking Buffy is a requirement to be my friend, so you're pretty much cleared there. I haven't gotten the new one yet and I'm hoping that I get a copy for my birthday because I'm not supposed to spend any money on books right now either... but oh man, I think I'm only going to be able to hold out as long as the weekend.
Posted by: Courtney | Tuesday, August 05, 2008 at 04:16 PM
You are only "Team Edward" all the way because you are still only on Twilight. Give it time.
TEENAGE VAMPIRE LOVE 4-EVA.
(Yes, I am always right.)
Posted by: Isabel | Tuesday, August 05, 2008 at 04:19 PM
...I haven't jumped on the Vampire wagon yet. I haven't even started the Vampire train yet. And this Stephanie Meyers chick is practically a home-grown heroine. I am ashamed.
xox
Posted by: heidikins | Tuesday, August 05, 2008 at 09:10 PM
Oh great, so am I gonna like this too?
Posted by: elise - All Or Nothing | Wednesday, August 06, 2008 at 10:40 AM
Yeah, you cannot make a good call about Jacob until at least book three, where he really makes his play for Bella.
Posted by: Janssen | Wednesday, August 06, 2008 at 12:52 PM
These books are good. They are soooo bad, they are good. I love them. I read them all before they were "cool" and I actually stood in line at midnight on Saturday with 169 teeny-boppers to get Breaking Dawn. And despite other people's comments, no one that I've talked to thinks that Breaking Dawn was nearly as good as the first two books and the third book? Not as good as this book. And as for Jacob? It's Edward all the way. Only someone who doesn't believe in true love would root for Jacob. Besides, in Breaking Dawn that gets wrapped up neatly. Whew. I feel strongly about these books I guess :) Anyway, have fun and if you want to chat about the books, drop me an email.
Posted by: Kari | Wednesday, August 06, 2008 at 02:32 PM
Yeah, Edward is pretty much the most smokingest icy cold vampire ever. I'm getting ready to start Breaking Dawn, but am afraid I'll get nothing else done for the next six hours until it's done. They're really so awful, but so incredibly great! Also, Amazon has the paperback of New Moon for about $6... I'm just saying, it's not a HUGE chunk of change.
Posted by: Wickedly Scarlett | Wednesday, August 06, 2008 at 05:06 PM
Gah! You can't be Team Edward until you at least read New Moon!
Also, I'm completely addicted to Buffy. It might be the best show ever.
Posted by: Erin | Wednesday, August 06, 2008 at 05:08 PM
I remember the Harry Potter craze and all these adults reading the books and I was like "you're all a bunch of idiots." And then I bought the first one for like $2 at Target and was HOOKED. And now I am going out this weekend to buy the Twilight books because everyone can't stop talking about them and I have to see what the big deal is.
Posted by: Kristabella | Thursday, August 07, 2008 at 10:00 PM
I have only read Twilight, but I am hooked! (However, I will be skipping your posts on the sequels... for now.)
The love story, I feel a little "meh" about - Edward is a wee bit creepy, no? - but I LOVE the vampires!
Posted by: Laurel | Thursday, August 21, 2008 at 04:20 PM
So, I kinda skipped over your Twilight posts at the time because I didn't want spoilers. But now that I have read the books, I am back for the Twilight posts and i have to say -- I know exactly what you are saying. What IS it about vampires that makes a story so damn compelling? I have always had a special place in my heart for vampire stores, and this series is just plain amazing. Not only are there vampires, but there are HOTT vampires. Seriously. Am in love with Edward.
On to the next post...
Posted by: Audrey | Sunday, October 12, 2008 at 05:40 PM