Operation Pink Herring

Fall Lineup

The following is my completely unbiased, well-researched, fair and balanced reivew of the fall TV season thus far.  And by "thus far," I mean "as far as I have gotten in my Tivo cache." 

It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia:  Best show on television.  A plus.

Supernatural:  I love Supernatural, and I love the direction they're taking in in this season.  We all knew Dean was going to escape from hell somehow, I mean, it's not like they can really have this show without him (dear people who are in charge of TV:  please don't try to have this show without Dean!)... and I think they did an excellent job of bringing him back within the first episode; far better a job than some shows I can think of, AHEM PRISON BREAK.  Also, best soundtrack ever.  A.

The Unit: Ah, the return of my beloved Bob Brown.  LOVE.  The premier was up to par, an A for my Delta Force hotties. 

Ace of Cakes:Still loving Duff and the gang, still wishing we could afford to get our wedding cake from them, still want to marry Geoff.  Did anyone else notice that Mary Alice was wearing this Threadless shirt in one of the last episodes?   A.

One Tree Hill:  This show is no longer even pretending to not be a soap, and I love the producers for it.  Nanny Carrie has kidnapped Dan and is keeping him alive so that she can slowly torture him as he waits for a heart transplant.  We are getting not-so-subtle hints that Nathan's big comeback to basketball will soon be derailed by a back problem, and who else is hoping that this provides us with a slide back into his totally fake depression and another riveting round of marriage counseling for Haylie and Nathan?  Just me?  OK THEN.   Ridiculous as the plot line is, I have to admit that I cried -- actually tears, we're not just talking getting choked up -- at the end of the last episode, during Quentin's funeral.  Here's to hoping they keep the plunge into soapdom going and bring him back from the dead.  I'm thinking maybe he was moved to witness protection, or he faked his own death... I'm just throwing out ideas here!  A, just because I like any show that isn't afraid to take things to the next level.  I'll raise this to an A plus if they throw in a demonic possession or a return from the dead this season.

Heroes:  I have finally caught up with the new episodes, and so far I am not disappointed.  A little confused, sure, but not disappointed.  I like any show with TWO Jess MarianosPeter Petrellis.  A minus.

NCIS:Cheap trick pretending like the team was going to be split up, as if anyone believed that.  Oh, look, the whole gang's back together in less than one episode's time!  Whatever, as long as they're back.  The "new" team sucked bigtime.  B plus.

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles:  When I was a kid, I saw some snippets of one of the Terminator movies on TV by accident and, dudes.  I still have nightmares about it.   So, I've never actually watched the original movies... but I'm still enjoying this show.  I am enjoying it much more now that the hottified Brian Austin Green is a regular character.   And it's possiblethat the first thing I said when I looked through the viewfinder in my new camera was "whoah!  It's all Terminator-y!" (you know, because it has the flashy red centering brackets and all shutter speed and f-stop and all kinds of other numbers whose meanings I have not yet determined displayed when you look through the viewfinder.  Not because it tells me to kill John Connor).  I am not sure where they're going with this Terminator-Chick-Is-Possibly-Bad-No-Wait-She's-Good-Hey-Isn't-She-A-Freaking-MACHINE-I-CALL-BULLSHIT plotline, but so far the season looks promising.  As long as they don't kill off Brian Austin Green.  And we can add THAT statement to the list of "things that the 1990s version of myself cannot BELIEVE I just said."  But seriously, who would have thought that geeky David Silver would grow up to be 100% do-able, while Dylan McKay is stuck doing Lifetime movies and strange cowboy mini-series things, with the occasional creepy-ass cameo on Law and Order: SVU?   I guess it just goes to show... something.  I'm not sure what, but it certainly shows SOMETHING.  B plus.

Law and Order: SVU:  Well, I guess Brilliant Editor Lindsey isn't coming back to One Tree Hill to break up Lucas and Peyton's happy marriage because SHE'S THE NEW ADA.  I am displeased, but it appears she is here to stay since she's been built into the the opening shot.  I still love the show, but it seems to me like they are going for too much drama, not enough old fashioned law and order in the recent seasons.  B plus.

Project Runway:  This is the first season that I've watched PR because I didn't think I'd like a show about fashion.  You know, since I don't know anything about fashion.  But low and behold, I LOVE ProRun.  It's fabulous.  I love seeing what the designers come up with for each challenge and I'm usually totally blown away by their skill in taking a heap of fabric and turning it into an outfit overnight.  I want a sewing machine.  And some talent, please.  And speaking of fashion, don't forget that Mission: Put Together kicks off tomorrow! B plus, and that's only because Kenley is still on the damned show.   Or maybe she isn't - I haven't seen last week's episode yet, DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING.

Smallville:  I am so over this show.  I have been over this show ever since Lana married Lex Luthor approximately sixteen seasons ago.  But since Ms. Lang-Luthor and Lex are both off the show for the moment, this season has been tolerable so far.   I still love Chloe best and I'm afraid they're going to kill her off soon since, you know, she's not actually in any of the Superman comics or movies.  C plus.

Prison Break:  Sooooo, Sarah's NOT dead.  Well.  I totally called that one (I knew they wouldn't kill her off), but I'm still not clear on how exactly Lincoln mistook the whole head-in-a-box thing... I mean, if someone left me a severed head in a box, I think I might notice if it was a stranger's head.  But, whatever.  I guess they found a Sarah look-alike and chopped off HER head.  I am letting it go because the whole Michael/Sarah dynamic is the most believable part of the show.  Example: anyone seen Lincoln's kid lately?    C minus.

Man vs. Wild:  We are currently about six episodes behind because 1) this is not a show you can watch while eating, 2) I eat a lot, 3) I still haven't forgiven Bear for breaking my heart.  The new format, which is supposed to be less fraudulent (I think) is boring and I almost want to cancel our Season Pass.  Almost.  D plus.

Fringe:  I was so excited for this show.  I thought it was going to be like a cross between the X-files and Heroes!  But, dudes.  I hate it.  I really, really hate it.  I hate the main chick, I hate the super-genius, I'm-sort-of-crazy-OR-AM-I guy, and I hate the super-fake sciency stuff.  The only thing I don't totally and completely hate is Pacey, and there we have another thing I never thought I'd hear myself say.  This show blows and I hope it gets canceled immediately so that we can bring back Moonlight or Journeyman instead.  F.

The Mentalist:  Wow, this show managed to commit two mortal sins in a one-hour pilot.  First, they totally ripped off the entire show's concept.  Hmmm,  let me see.  A detective-type person who everyone thinks is psychic but really he just pays very careful attention to detail?   I think that's pretty much the tagline of Psych on USA.  Second, the protagonist is genuinely unlikeable.  He's as annoying as Horatio Cane or Bobby Goren, and come to think of it - I think they ripped quite a bit of his character's background directly from Bobby Goren's CV.  But both of these blatant rip-offs were terribly executed, because Psych is actually funny and Law and Order: CI.... well, it's Law and Order.   It GETS to have an annoying character.  F minus, Season Pass canceled. 

Knight Rider:Again, wow.  We only recorded this because Joel wanted to see it, but I kept an open mind.  Sort of.  Until they opened up the pilot with a scene that took place at "Foreign Consulate, USA".... um, WHICH ONE?  Maybe you could make up a fictional country, at the very least?  That kind of complete vaguery is only OK when it's being done sarcastically, like the Humanitarian Organization in Zoolander, for example.  Oh, and then.  Then KITT is on fire, but it's not just a normal fire.  It's a super-chemical sort of fire that burns so hot that even driving at 300+ miles per hour can't put it out!  Oh noes!  What shall our protagonists do, while a whole secret lair full of scientists and geniuses tries a new set of calculations?  They strip to their very sexy underwear, of course!  And dude, they weren't even sweating.  This would be OK in an Austin Powers movie.  F minus, I will not be sitting through another hour of THAT, thankyouverymuch. 

So much television, so little time.  And far too much time when I'm supposed to be doing things like "being at work" and "doing my laundry" and "excercising" and "IT'S TIME FOR WORK AGAIN?  ALREADY?"  Priorities, people. 

Viewer discretion advised

WARNING

The following video contains disturbing images and is intended for mature audiences only.  You may have nightmares after watching this video.  You may want to break things.  If you are pregnant, nursing, or plan to become pregnant, please talk with your doctor before watching. 

Comcast commercial from Pink Herring on Vimeo.

And just for fun, here's another lovely little bit from our friends at Comcast.  Too bad they're not showing the one where Katie shops for a house via the magical channel 888 anymore.  Yes, TOO BAD INDEED. 

Katie Comcast from Pink Herring on Vimeo.

Ten bucks says "Katie" considers jumping off a tall building every time this commercial airs.  

This and that, here and there

My new camera, let me show you it.

So, I bought myself a new camera.  It's a Nikon D80 and I am in love with it.   Our cute little point-and-shoot is still quite useful for carrying around in my purse and taking self-portraits in hotel mirrors, but my Nikon, it is my baby.  And now, just imagine!  Instead of seeing crappy pictures of my cats, now you'll be seeing crappy pictures of my cats in 3872x2593 pixels.  Like this!

Plus, the in-camera processing is pretty much The Shit.

Oh, yes.  I foresee many good times ahead.

Oh, crap.  I have to go to class tonight.

The impetus to finally up and buy this new camera, which I've been salivating over for months (ever since I realized that our cute little point-and-shoot did not have the ability to adjust f-stops manually) was that I'm taking another photography class.  It's noncredit and not a big deal at all, but it's already 100 times better than the last class because the teacher is not insane.  One week down, and so far that hasn't been a single picture of a stuffed pig dressed up in an Attila the Hun costume! 

Hey, guess what!  I went to Utah!

I got to try out my new camera in Utah this weekend.  I had a meeting in Salt Lake City on Friday, and I got to meet the fabulous Heidikins on Saturday.  I am on a roll with meeting up with bloggers lately!  Heidi took me on a whirlwind tour of the SLC area, and dudes.  It's pretty out there.   We went up to Snowbird (where my little brother worked for approximately one week earlier this year) and on the way down we saw a storm passing through the canyon below.   It was awesome and scary and beautiful.  We also saw a sphinx with the face of Joseph Smith and the famous Temple Square and topped it all off with lunch at Cafe Rio.  Now, I've carefully considered the statement I'm about to make, and I want you to know that I take food very seriously.  The burrito I had at Cafe Rio was the best I've ever had.  It was better than Chipotle.  As I said to Heidi while we were eating (at 11:30am, after we'd already made trips to both a Starbucks AND an Einstein Brother's Bagel shop earlier in the morning), the only thing that could have made that meal better is if I had been really, really hungry.  Is there anything better than eating something truly delicious when you're really, really hungry?  I think not. 

Boob tube

I think I'll need to dedicate an entire post to my thoughts on the return of TV, because my thoughts.  They are many.  But it's nice to actually have new shows to watch!  I sort of forgot what that was like.  Now I'm back to bemoaning the terrible decision to get the Tivo that only records one show at a time.  But still!  New stories to watch! Also: Wild card, bitches!  YEEEEHAW!

I don't know if I'm becoming even more cranky now that I'm nearing twenty-eight or if commercials are really stepping out on a limb nowadays, but there are three commercials on right now that not only annoy me, they offend me.   The first one might only be a regional commercial, and in that case you should feel very lucky if you don't live in the Baltimore metro area.  If you do, though, have you seen that Comcast commercial that's on EVERY FIVE SECONDS singing Get what you want!  Get what you need! while a series of attractive, hip-looking people (mostly women) jump on a trampoline in the background, whipping their head around like they're having the time of their lives at a rave?  Does it make you want to kill something, too?  Because I hate that commercial so much that I can't even fast forward and ignore it.  I have to watch it, every time, and every time I come to hate it that much more. 

The other two shit-list commercials are the two variations of the High Fructose Corn Syrup is Actually Quite Good For You Campaign. 

I think that these commercials are personally offensive to me because they are so well done.  If they were just filmed in someone's basement with a camcorder, they wouldn't be so goddamned convincing.  And the thing is, I consume my fair share of High Fructose Corn Syrup.  But at least I KNOW I'm making a Poor Food Choice when I do so, and I sort of feel bad about it for a second or two before enjoying that delicious cinnamon frosted Pop Tart!  Now I'm all kinds of confused.  I should go on a high fructose corn syrup boycott, just to protest this ridiculous campaign, I think to myself whenever they come on.   But how is that fair?  I don't WANT to give up cinnamon frosted Pop Tarts!  NOW I AM CONFUSED ABOUT POP TARTS, THAT'S WHAT THESE COMMERCIALS HAVE DONE TO ME.   I hope those bastards burn in hell, that's all I'm saying.

And on that note, I think I'll get back to work.

Or break something.  WILD CARD, BITCHES!

It's coming....

Get ready, people.  Mission: Put Together - Super-Fabulous Fall Edition is coming.  

That's right.  There is an end in sight to the boring, joyless monotony of getting dressed in the morning and not taking a picture of your outfit.   After some tricky negotiation and a little bit of bribery, the month of October has graciously agreed to host M:PT Fall Edition!  And this is in addition to hosting Max's 10th birthday - October, you deserve a serious round of applause.

Here's a little refresher course on M:PT for those of you who may have gone directly back to wearing wrinkled, possibly-dirty-but-eh-what-the-hell-it's-103-degrees-out-and-I'm-sweaty-anyway khakis to work the minute May's M:PT challenge came to an end.  (Hey, don't look at me like that.  These are my clean khakis.  I think.)

Mission: Put Together... what the heck is it? 

Why, funny you should ask!  It just so happens that the wise and benevolent RA has crafted a helpful page explaining just that!  And wait, didn't I write about this too?  Oh, yes.  I did.  That was smart of me. 

To recap, Mission: Put Together was an idea borne out of the collective desire that RA and I had to take our wardrobes up a notch without breaking our budgets.  We started a photo pool and invited ya'll to join us in our picture-taking for the month of May.   Remember that?  Yeah, that was fun.

When the Official Mission ended on May 31st, we left the pool open for "unofficial" submissions, but this is the moment you've been waiting for, Internet.  Another month-long orgy of photos of shoes taken furtively in office bathrooms with crappy fluorescent lighting!  And we've generously planned this for the fall, so that some of us won't get caught wearing the exact same outfits we took pictures of all during May.  Ahem.

But wait!  There's more!

RA and I were both blown away by the response to the first Mission: Put Together.  Honesty, I thought maybe a few other people would join in.  Maybe we'd get 100 pictures over the month.   There are currently over 400 pictures in the pool, and there were 34,000 views on the photos and almost 2,900 comments during May alone.  It kind of makes me wish that I hadn't admitted that one time my wrap dress came unwrapped.  In public.  

And so RA and I got to talking about how great it would be if we could channel all that positive energy (I don't think we had to delete even one negative or disparaging comment!) in some tangible way.   So, in addition to posting fun pictures of our outfits to a flickr pool, this fall will also have a (completely and totally optional) Put Together: With a Mission component. 

The main charity we’ve chosen to be PT:M's beneficiary is Dress for Success.  Their mission "to promote the economic independence of disadvantaged women by providing professional attire, a network of support and the career development tools to help women thrive in work and in life” really could not be more in line with the original idea of M:PT.  So, if you've got tons of old biznass pants clogging up your closet space, consider donating them to Dress for Success!  And for everything that doesn't fit into the "interview-appropriate attire" guidelines that Dress for Success is looking for, there's the local Goodwill or Salvation Army.  Take a picture of anything you donate and post it to the M:PT pool!  And if you are inclined to support any of these charities with greenbacks rather than biznass pants, let us know.  We will NOT be discussing individual donations - we'd just like to be able to tally everything up at the end of the month.

Last but not least, local affiliates of the national organization DonateMyDress.org will accept used prom and evening gowns.  And you know what else they take?  Bridesmaid dresses.  OH, YES.  Those once-worn tea-length dresses can go to good use.  And get the hell out of your closet!

Let me say again: this is 100% optional.  I think I've talked enough about my hatred for charitable giving under duress here, so please know that there is no obligation to donate a single shirt or spend a single dollar.  We will not be compiling a list of who donated what, nor is donating clothing/dollars a requirement to join the picture-posting funfest.   We just thought it would be cool to take M:PT to the next level.  And honestly, I will take any excuse I can get to purge my closet. 

I am also issuing a personal challenge for myself:  I am going to try to make it through the entire month of M:PT Fall Edition without purchasing a single item of clothing or a single accessory for myself.  If I have to block anntaylorloft.com from my browser, SO HELP ME I'LL DO IT.  I've been successful in keeping to a $50 clothing allowance per month during the summer, so what the hell, I figure.  Let's get this party started.  We've got a wedding to fund and a pretty new camera to play with (HI!  I FINALLY BOUGHT A BIG GIRL CAMERA! WHO WANTS TO TEACH ME HOW TO USE MY NEW NIKON?)  Besides, who needs shopping when It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia is coming back soon?

(The first person to post a link to anything 1) cute, and 2) on sale, is going directly to hell.)

Remember:

• Mission: Put Together is for any outfit you are proud of.  It doesn't have to be a new outfit, an expensive outfit, or an outfit you've never worn before. 

• M:PT is not just for office-wear.  Jeans and casual outfits are welcome and encouraged!

• There is no need to post a picture every day, and no pressure to be PT all the time.   Post when you feel inspired.

• If you don't have a Flickr account, you can email your pictures to me or RA and we'll post them for you.

• BE NICE.  Disparaging, rude, and unkind words of any sort will deleted, and a pox put upon them.

The official M:PT Headquarters (and the Fall Edition M:PT Headquarters) are over on RA's site, and the flickr pool is still here.   Grab yourself a button, polish up your sassy red necklaces, and start scoping out good spots to take pictures of yourself at work without anyone noticing!  Questions?  Comments?  Tips on how to operate a Nikon camera?  Leave it in the comments or email me (operationpinkherring [at] gmail [dot] com) or RA (definitelyra [at] gmail [dot] com)! 

October 1.   M:PT Fall Edition.  Be there.

Stirling

Previously: Edinburgh and the Bishopton, home of the sweetest hotel room on earth.

Stirling!  Day... 4?  Are we really only on Day 4?

After my official work obligations were completed, we were all set to go America tourist all over everybody's asses.  Our original plan was to hit up the town of Stirling, see the castle and whatever else there was to see, and then jet over to St. Andrew's to absorb some golfing culture and get my dad his much-coveted St. Andrew's golf shirt.  It seemed simple enough, looking at a map.   Stirling and St. Andrew's are both relatively near Glasgow and Edinburgh, where the major train stations are, and only 75 miles apart from each other.  It seemed very doable at the time*.  Looking at a map now, I have no idea why it seemed feasible, but it did.  Either the travel bug renders me even more impervious to logic than usual, or I really have inherited a full copy of my mother's Vacation Overachiever Gene.   In any case, we did not make it to St. Andrew's.   But it's OK, because Stirling was very pretty.  And we managed to get my dad some bootleg St. Andrew's gear in a department store back in Glasgow, which is what REALLY matters.

So!  Stirling.  Bonnie place.

The train ride from Glasgow to Stirling was typically idyllic.  There were lots of sheep and the grass was very, very green.   We followed the Back Walk along the border of the old city wall, meandering higher and higher until we finally reached the castle at the top of the hill.

 

The border of the castle is just surrounded by these purple plants, which I won't even try to identify.  The air was positively filled with dandelion-like floaters.  You can actually see them in some of the pictures.  It almost looked like snow!

We spent a good part of the day walking around the castle, taking a free tour, stunning the tour guide with my knowledge about castle engineering (kitchens are far from the main house because they catch on fire!), you know.  The usual. 

 
(The formal gardens and courtyard)

 

(Dude, even dandelions are pretty in Scotland)

(Another close-up of a flower.  [Insert exasperated sigh from travel companion here.]  I just cannot help myself.)

I took about a frajillion pictures in the castle itself, but I'll spare you the rest.  If you are interested, I've helpfully tagged all the pictures with "Stirling Castle" on flickr because I'm compulsive like that.  

After stopping for some lunch (pizza), we walked across the city to visit Stirling Bride.  Which, you know, is only cool because BRAVEHEART ONCE FOUGHT THERE.  

The Battle of Stirling Bridge took place in 1297 and that just blows my mind.  I forget just how young our country is.

And that was Stirling!  One day, 123 pictures!  I think that might just be a personal record.  I think I'll go have a cookie.

*It might have been doable if we'd rented a car.  Maybe.   

The meet-up that almost wasn't

Once upon a time, in a land far far away, there was a lass named Alynda.  Her blog was named "Alyndabear".  Which is her nickname, you know Alynda (her name) + bear (bears are cute) = Alyndabear.  Some of us may have wrongly assumed that her blog title was pronounced "Aly 'n da bear" but those people would be wrong and also possibly a little slow in the head.  Because, seriously?  ALY N DA BEAR?   That makes almost as much sense as Operation Pink Herring.  Shut up.

Anyway!  One day a long, long time agoMs. Alynda+bear announced that she had just booked a holiday (they call them holidays in Australia... trust me, I know these things) to the United States and said she'd like to meet up with any blogger-friends who might live nearby.  "I would be honored to make your acquaintance," I told her. 

Ok, actually, it was more like this:

38 Responses

1. Operation Pink Herring Says:
   April 14th, 2008 at 11:38 pm

          I’ll totally meet up with you in DC!

Because some of us cannot leave a comment without using either the words "totally" or "dude". Or both. Sometimes the situation warrants both.  Dude, don't look at me like that.

And the days and months flew by, and Ms. Alynda+bear was in Washington, DC.  A mere 40 minutes from OPH Headquarters.   And I totally met up with her in DC.

Oh, the universe tried to keep our meetup from happening.   First, it gave her an evil roommate for her trip who refused to pass on phone messages, so that when I got into my car on Sunday morning I thought there was probably a 50% chance that I would show up at the Air and Space museum at 1pm to hang out with myself and the copy of New Moon that I brought with me.  (Oh, yes.  That wasn't embarrassing AT ALL when my bag was searched by museum security.)  Then it made me chug a big cup of coffee, chased by an even bigger bottle of water in the car.  And then!  Then it made the Orange Line metro hold me hostage for FORTY MINUTES while we single-tracked our way to NOWHERE.  By this time I had to pee.  Bad.  Really, really bad.  And I was also way late with no way of contacting Alynda+bear to tell her I was on my way, but at that point I did not really care about standing up a blogger who had come all the way from Australia.  No, I really just cared getting off that damned train before both my kidneys gave out.

But I soldiered on!  Finally, FINALLY, we arrived at an actual stop and I fled the train in search of a bathroom (even though I was now 25 minutes late and still five stops away).  I switched to the Blue Line, which zoomed along to the Smithsonian stop in no time at all.  And when I arrived at the Air and Space Museum, forty-five minutes late (DAMN YOU ORANGE LINE, DAMN YOU COFFEE), the lovely Alynda and her equally lovely friend Kirby were still there.  Janet (also lovely) joined us and we had a (lovely) lunch were I tried to keep the fawning over Alynda and Kirby's Australian accents to a minimum.  I failed.  

What can I say?  I totally adore an accent.  Dude.  

 

 

Scotland, Day 3: A play in two acts

Before we move on to Thursday, let's rewind a bit to the Glasgow Central Station, Wednesday evening.  Dragging our luggage through the somewhat confusing station (erm, everything is a bit confusing when you have been awake for 36 hours), we suddenly started to hear shouting in the distance.   Shouting and... singing?   When we entered the platform where our next train to Bishopton was located, we saw the source of all the commotion.  About a hundred people were lined up to board a neighboring train.  Many were carrying flags, lots were wearing kilts.  Everyone was singing.   We couldn't understand a word they sang, but we deduced that they were headed to some sort of sporting event (a soccer game, we learned once we arrived at our hotel). 

Glasgow Central Station - soccer fans boarding the train from Pink Herring on Vimeo.

Generally, I do not enjoy watching sports at all.  If I actually know someone who is playing, that's one thing... but otherwise, I'd rather do pretty much anything than sit and watch a sporting event.  Football?  Boring.  Soccer?  Boring.  Baseball?  BORING.  And it's not that I haven't tried; I really, really have.  I just can't make myself care. But I think that if giant foam fingers and seven-dollar hotdogs were replaced by kilts and drunken Scots singing their hearts out, I might just be able to get on board with the whole thing. 

So, after that train departed, our train departed, and we arrived in Bishopton.   When I travel for work, I don't get to choose the hotels I stay in.  I stay where everyone else is staying, I just email the travel coordinator with the nights I need a room and POOF! Magically a reservation is born.  Most of the time this is lovely.  Other times, the room is accidentally booked under some horrid misspelling of my last name, or it's not booked in my name at all, or I'm given the address of the wrong Hyatt in Chicago and that is not quite so lovely.  In any case, the hotels we use are always the same type of businessy chains and everything is always fine.  I never bother to do any research, I just print out the address and phone number and shove it in my travel folder. 

We were a bit surprised when we arrived at the designated hotel for this trip.  I've never worked with the company that ran this meeting before (this was actually my coworker's trip, but she didn't want to go so I volunteered to take her place... I'm nice like that), so maybe they stay at super-swanky hotels all the time.  Maybe all the normal hotels in Scotland were booked up.  Maybe all the hotels in Scotland look like castles and have butlers.  I have no idea.   But this hotel, it was amazing.  It was more like a castle.  A castle surrounded by a million bunny rabbits.

 
Hello, Governor! from Pink Herring on Vimeo.

Note the first: The Narration.  Please remember that I was jetlagged.  I mean, I always narrate videos like that, but at least this time I sort of have an excuse.  Jetlag made me do it!

Note the second: Hello, Governor!  Although I have no idea where this phrase actually comes from, we are aware that this has nothing to do with Scotland.  At all.  That did not stop me from laughing hysterically every time Joel said it.  Jetlag made me do it!  (Actually, that's a lie.  I still think it's funny.)

Note the third: The Bunnies. Apparently, bunnies are to Scotland what squirrels are to New York.  The cab driver that dropped us off told us, his thick Scottish accident full of disdain, that "this place is overrun with rabbits.  Being from a city that is overrun with a different kind of vermin, we found this hilarious.

Bishopton!  Day 3!  (Thursday!)

We hadn't planned to do much on Thursday.  We'd budgeted the morning for sleeping in and recovering, and then I was supposed to attend two meetings back to back in the afternoon.  But then it turned out that whoops!  One of the meetings had been rescheduled for yesterday, and they forgot to tell me!  End result:  we had three extra hours to do as we pleased on Thursday morning.  Instead of sitting in a conference room for three hours, we went for a long walk by the the river near the hotel (which we'd identified as the River Clyde).

 

I'm certainly not complaining.  (I am just really, really glad that I decided to double check the meeting time before hopping in a cab back to Glasgow to sit in a conference room by myself.)

Once we made it down to the path (construction of a golf course was blocking the normal route from the hotel to the riverbank, so we had to slog through a muddy trail in the woods for a bit) we had a great view of the front of the hotel.  You see what I mean about the clouds?  I loved them.  They made everything look dramatic and beautiful.

 

To the left, the path extended as far as I could see along the riverbank. 

 

We followed the path in the other direction until it ended under the M8 highway.   We walked back along the road at a brisk pace, since we'd gone much too far to retrace our steps and still make it to my remaining meeting on time and we weren't exactly sure which road led to our out-of-the-way hotel/castle.   But in the end, we made it back right on time, and I even got to snap this picture along the highway.   It's one of my favorites from the trip, so I guess I should thank whoever rescheduled that meeting.

This is as close as I come to blogging about politics

There are a lot of outrageous/funny/interesting bumper stickers in our neighborhood.  Like this one, for example.  I would love to have a conversation with the owner of this vehicle.  I can only assume that they'd be open-minded and not at all judgemental!

 But there is one car that is my favorite, by far. 

I'm not even sure what I love the most about this car.  The back window that has consisted of a tarp for as long I can remember?  The innocent Ravens sticker thrown in with the political rants and "FORDS SUCK"?   The fact that this "car" (which is really more like a peice of installation art) is up on blocks more often than it runs?   No, I think the entire rear bumper (which reads  "Hey Martin* Give Me Back My Money, You Thief!") is my favorite part.

*I assume this refers to Martin O'Malley (D), former mayor of Baltimore and current governor of Maryland**.

**Maryland is actually a blue state.  Yes!  I swear. 

There's another "sticker" on the front bumper that I forgot to get a picture of... it says "Vote for Freedom!  Thanks VETS!!!" 

But that's not all.  Simple painted messages on car bumpers won't cut it in an election year.  And that is why this patriotic fellow has now started painting on the lamp posts in our neighborhood. 

God, I love Baltimore.  Don't ever let me tell you differently.

Scotland: Days 1-2

Ah, Scotland.  Bonnie, bonnie Scotland.  We have now been back for, oh, two weeks?  One week?  It's now September (WTF?  SEPTEMBER?) so maybe we've been back for a month?  I have no idea.  I can't stop crying over that video of the hugging lion long enough to figure it out.  And yes, I'm aware that this video was probably a huge internet sensation about seven years ago (I like to jump on bandwagons after they've already done a few victory laps), so I think that would make it 1992 right now? Merry Christmas? 

Anyway, I've been meaning to write a post about Scotland.  Scotland was awesome!  You should all go to Scotland.  Oh, wait.  You've already been.  And you're already planning to go.  So... nevermind!  Good job, everyone!  Scotland, ho!

Every day I think "I should really write a post about Scotland", and then every day I don't write a post about Scotland because I just don't have time to do it justice.  And then that gets me to thinking about how I still haven't made a photo album for our trip to Barcelona.  Or our trip to Lake Tahoe.  Which was... one year ago.   Wait, Nessie who?  Oh, right.  Scotland.

So here is my brilliant solution, internets.  I am going to do this in segments.   Smart idea, no?  I wish I had thought of it myself!  Oh, wait.  What were you saying? 

BWI and Newark!  Day 1!  (Tuesday!) 

Let me begin by saying: I am not at all a fan of overnight flights.  I have enough trouble sleeping in our Tempurpedic Bed O' Magic, with my well-loved sleeping mask and my Special Walmart Fan for background noise.  Sleeping on an overnight flight is a total joke.  But that's how the world works, you fly eastbound over the Atlantic and you're going to be grouchy, groggy, and nauseous the next day.   But our flights over were about as comfortable as we could have possibly have hoped: the puddle jumper from Baltimore to Newark was fairly smooth and didn't even smell too strongly of piss and Mystery Airline Bathroom Cleaner; the flight from Newark to Edinburgh was empty enough that we had a whole row of three seats to ourselves and we had a choice of 20 on-demand movies and our own personal TV screens in the back of every seat.  (I watched When in Vegas, and it was actually pretty entertaining.   Just in case you were wondering.)

Edinburgh!  Day 2!  (Wednesday!)

By the time we'd arrived in Edinburgh, I'd practiced saying Eh-din-burr-ah enough times in my head to sort of get it right and we actually managed to get an hour or two of sleep.  The airport had an extremely helpful information desk that sold us tickets to the Airlink shuttle bus and told us where to pick it up and everyone had the most delightful accents on earth.  Also, I brushed my teeth and managed to order a coffee without too much confusion.  Score. 

We made it onto the double decker Airlink bus, which dropped us off at the Waverly  bus station in downtown Edinburgh.  I have to commend the Scots on the ease of use with all of their public transportation: the recorded announcements that played on all the buses and trains we took were clear and easy to understand.  There were electronic boards listing all the departure times and gates, the gates were all clearly and logically numbered.  When the train or bus started moving, an announcement would come on saying "This train is for Glasgow, calling in stop1, stop2, stop3, and stop4.  Next stop, stop1."  As someone who has accidentally  taken a bus from Baltimore to New York (which is in New York) when she meant to go to Newark (which is in New Jersey) (which is a different state than New York) in the past, this was reason enough to give Scotland an A+ in my book. 

We managed to store our bags in the train station for the day, buy some breakfast/lunch/WHATEVER IT WAS FOOD, take out some pounds from the "cashpoint", and make our way out of the train station.   I just pointed the camera around taking pictures of all kind of buildings with no idea what they actually were, but I am sure that Jenners is a department store, and that this is Princes Street.   We walked along Princes Street until we were directly below Edinburgh Castle, and then we hiked our way on up.  

  

We spent the rest of the day in the castle, which was enormous.  This is the first real castle I've ever seen, and it was even cooler after having just read Pillars of the Earth.  I got a real thrill out of knowing what a "keep" was.  And then I fell asleep standing up for a few minutes and took a few blurry pictures of my feet.  

A note on the weather weather: maybe I'm a little biased at the moment because Baltimore is so disgustingly sweaty, but I thought the much-maligned British weather was downright delightful.  Jeans and a sweatshirt were comfortable each day we were there, and I think I'd be perfectly happy living with summer temperatures in the 50s and 60s.   It rained a bit (we were told it was the wettest August on record, or in 50 years, or something like that), but it was never a stay-inside-all-day-and-watch-movies kind of rain.  This first day in Edinburgh was the rainiest day of our trip, but we were fine with rain jackets and no umbrella, even being outside most of the day.  It misted on several other occasions, but it wasn't even enough to be an inconvenience.  The sun was absent most of the time, but the cloudy and overcast skies were just incredibly dramatic; not at all depressing.

After we'd seen all we could see at the castle, we made our way down the Royal Mile and back to the Waverly Train Station.  We retrieved our bags, bought tickets to Glasgow and got on the train. 

We made it the Queen Street Station in Glasgow, successfully navigated ourself to the Central Train Station in Glasgow and caught our next train to Bishopton - where our almost-embarrassingly-super-duper-fancy hotel was located - and what's that?  You'd like a video tour of our hotel suite?  Well, I declare, it must be your lucky day, Internet!  Because it just so happens that I took a half-delusional, very sleep-deprived video of our room when we arrived!  So what I need you all to do is to cross your fingers and hope real hard that tonight I'll actually be able to locate said video on our home computer.  I recently reorganized everything on there and there is a slight, teensy chance that I might have accidentally "organized away" the few videos I took on the trip.   

Peace out, to be continued, happy Friday, et cetera et cetera!