Over the past few weeks, I have become somewhat obsessed with completing some of the home improvement projects that have been hanging around on our to-do list since, oh... we bought our house? Which was in 2003? I am not really sure what triggered this particular compulsion in my brain, but it has been activated and there is no going back. Last week I had a plumber come over and fix our kitchen sink, which leaked occasionally under some unknown set of circumstances. I never could get it to leak on purpose, and trust me, I tried. I turned the water on super hot, ran the garbage disposal, tried the dishwasher on various different cycles, did all of these things at the same time while wearing a blindfold and hopping on one foot -- NOTHING. And yet the pan I put under the pipe would have water in it from time to time. Not every day, not every week, but sometimes. If there's anything I hate, it's a pipe that doesn't even have the decency to leak consistently.
Anyway, the pipe is hereby fixed. I still have a pan under there, just in case. Obviously this pipe cannot be trusted. But I feel better, it's fixed, box checked. NEXT!
We have finally purchased a new window for the broken bit of glass over our door that's been serving as a convenient escape route for all of our heat for the past five winters; now Joel just needs to install it. Joel has also fixed the broken weatherstripping around our front door and scraped off all the chipped paint around the doorframe so we can re-coat it with paint that is actually intended for outdoor use. Sigh. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate the assholes who rehabbed our house? HATEHATEHATE. I am trying not to project this hatred onto the house itself, but oh, it is hard.
Tomorrow I have a dude coming over to clean and tune up our furnace and clean out all the air vents and most importantly, the dryer vent. When Mr. Dude came over to take a look and give me an estimate earlier this week, he seemed very concerned that our dryer is packed on top of the washing machine in a closet that has about an inch of clearance on each side. When I informed him there was no possible way that the dryer can be pulled out from the wall because it doesn't fit through the door frame and there's no way in hell I'm taking that door frame off again, he seemed to think this was going to cause some problems. Have I mentioned that sometimes I really hate our stupid 107-year-old house? And the rehabbers who made a laundry closet that's too small to fit any machines manufactured on this planet?
Next on the list is to find a good roofer to come over and determine if it's our roof or the neighbor's roof that is leaking water into the litterbox room when it rains. Because, yes, water, it is leaking into our house. I discovered this when I was vacuuming out the poo-room and the vacuum brush was suddenly leaving wet marks across the uber-dusty surfaces of the plastic storage containers we keep in there. My first reaction was to round up Henry and Max into separate interrogation rooms and then force one of them to flip on the other and tell me who had managed to piss on the rug underneath a pile of junk, because that takes considerable skill. But upon a complicated forensic investigation, my nose and I determined that it wasn't cat piss soaking the rug, it was rain water. So, yeah. Anyone know a good roofer?
Last but not least, we had a handyman come over to see about replacing three of our windows. Two of them are permanently fogged up inside, which has been the case since we moved in, but suddenly it has become absolutely intolerable. Joel need to call the manufacturer to try to get us some replacements for free, and that better happen soon because those windows and their foggy trickery are driving me insane. We also need to buy a new window for the poo-room because the one that's in there... well, it's the wrong size. The propped-up drywall that's holding it in place was serving quite well until a few weeks ago, when a heavy sideways rain storm resulted in a huge bubble of water behind the paint. DEAR PEOPLE WHO REHABBED OUR HOUSE: ROT IN HELL. So, yeah. Windows. Need to buy some.
And when the handyman/window installer is here again, I'm going to get him to re-seal both of our bathtubs too, because all of a sudden the DIY job we did a few years ago after the great Water Leaking Out of Tub and Through Wall Incident (HELL. THE REHABBERS ARE GOING TO HELL.) is now driving me crazy as well. It is working, but it looks crappy and it must be fixed. Soon.
All of these minor-ish (with the exception of the water leaking in, that's a real problem) repairs are suddenly driving me nuts and I am not really sure what my problem is. Joel is out of town for a race this weekend, and last night I found myself moving all of the furniture in the front room (which is heavier than I remembered) so I could roll up the carpet in search of the source of the mysterious cat piss odor. The phantom cat odor has been surfacing at irregular intervals for years, but last night just seemed like the right time to move all the couches (by myself) and roll up the rug (by myself), wash the floor underneath and carefully inspect for signs of cat piss (none found) and then move all of the furniture back (by myself).
The really strange thing about all this is that these minxy fogged-up windows and a less-than-professional (but fully functional) tub sealing job are really weighing me down, while the fact that we haven't had a bed frame since we sold our old bed (in JUNE) doesn't bother me a bit. And until we have a new bed frame, the new mattress and boxspring (which are not really that new anymore) are just resting unattractively on the floor. I am OK with this. And because the mattress is sitting on the floor, the storage containers full of clothes that used to go under the bed are stacked up in the hallway, serving as a cat condo for Henry.... also, fine with me. I have a stack of picture frames next to the nightstand, still waiting to be hung and a drawer full of fall clothes begging to be organized and donated to Goodwill.
But all of that seems unimportant when there are dusty air vents and magically foggy windows to be dealt with.
I have projects like that, too. I need a new garbage disposal because ours mysteriously stopped working - doesn't make a sound when it's turned on. We also need to get someone in to look at our washing machine because it blows a fuse every 6 or 7 loads and we have to dismantle it to replace the fuse. Annoying!
Posted by: Courtney | Friday, October 17, 2008 at 07:03 PM
Wow. We managed to box up our old appliances this weekend and I thought that was a major accomplishment. You officially have us beat!
Posted by: nancypearlwannabe | Sunday, October 19, 2008 at 07:57 PM
DUDE! DUDE! I could have written this post. In the last two weeks: our dishwasher broke, our garbage disposal broke, our sink started leaking, and our toilet more or less exploded and rained down the lower two floors. RAINED TOILET WATER INTO THE HOUSE. it was awesome.
Posted by: janet | Tuesday, October 21, 2008 at 10:14 PM
Bad Rehabbers...they will be dealt with on a special level of hell, I'm sure of it. Hope your checklist is all checkked up, sistah.
Posted by: HollowSquirrel | Wednesday, October 22, 2008 at 08:59 PM
If you've noticed someone stalking you for hours on end, it's me. I'm bored at work, so I've been going through your archives.
But, I feel you on the home improvement front. We just moved into a house a few months ago, and the painting. will. not. end. Add in the shortage of funds when it comes to decorating or buying home electronics like, you know, a vacuum, and you have me, the former slob who is starting to twitch at the sight of her living room.
Anyhoo, reading through your archives has recharged my blogging desire. I am hereby restarting!!
Good luck with getting the house together though, I'm right there with you.
Posted by: Cheryl | Wednesday, October 29, 2008 at 02:40 PM